Unsuspecting women being seminally disenfranchised: It's a practice older than time itself. But I think the soccer mom in the opening clip is still seeking therapy. I've seen girls performing "The Manchurian Gas Mask" with less animosity in their walk-offs.
Like spending the entire 2 hours and 28 minutes in front of Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga, these women have found a taste they'll never be able to get out of their mouths. No refunds. All reflexes. Perhaps another hobby would better suit their needs? Like professional Marmite taster (look it up), or Human Scarecrow (don't look that up) for example.
Steamrolling into their first attempt at OnlyFans, or making some sort of biological statement? I can't confirm or deny either side, but the total lack of fucks given by half the guys behind the camera makes me think we have some eFukt regulars this time around. whattup?
Anybody have the technical name for this phenomenon? or a real explanation? Specifically one that doesn't involve voodoo dolls, Penn & Teller or Planet Wing's suicide sauce. I want answers.
Let me formally introduce you to GM. aka Grandpa Merrick. aka Wrinkle Rocker. aka Mr. Steal Yo Girl. Rather than live out his twilight years chasing dusty jellyfish, he wakes up every day and chooses violence. And intravenous Cialis.
While you're doom scrolling through your 407th video of brainrotted TikTok leftovers, these alpha females are out here doing something productive. Especially the victims of el diablo de la mayonesa seen around the 0:45 second mark. You two are clearly not the same.
It's that time of year again. When degenerate girls jacked to the tits in daddy issues insist on doing it for tha gram but end up frail, fucked and forgotten. Not since the days of blindly acquiring porn ala 5600 baud Limewire have I come across a female with such anti-seminal fortitude.
Never have I seen a man do something so incredibly vile with such charm. Where there's tension, he provides laughter. Where there's pain, he provides comfort. And where there's feces on the tip of his penis... he provides dinner.
I proudly present "La Magique Buco Culo" or "The Magic Butt Hole. This feat of pure sphincter talent took years of blood, sweat and tears all culminating to this moment. Captured on webcam and entered into the historical archives for your enjoyment.
It truly never ends. Let's just label this one the Shawshank Redemption of "wtf, your load tastes like Alan Greenspan's deceased asshole" Alan probably isn't actually dead, but I trust that the implied mental image is still effective. Game on.
Want hard proof that humans are still all about charity? Look no further friendos. This scumcunt offers some locals the ultimate handout: A free reminder to get yourself STD tested next time you go reaching for those frozen Reese's Cups. You can find her new profile HERE.
Today is my old man yells at cloud moment as I inform you that a two foot garden gnome being yoinked out of a woman's lower digestive system makes me feel like the golden age of adult entertainment is long behind us. They truly just don't make them like they used to. It's over.