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Stretch 
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About:

RANK: #1056

Group:
The Janitors
Real name: Ozzie Oswald
Location: Cornwall
Age: 21

Profile views: 873
Media rated: 6
Media viewed: 266
Comments: 55

Best media:
Chick Doing a Belly Dance for her Boyfriend Gets Owned

For her sake, I hope those boobs are really bouncy. Ouch.

Category: Funny

Stretch's log:
Date: 03/12/2008 7:33amNutcase Gets Revenge on a Hardware Store with his Car
Comment: Had buttloads of work to do at uni! Hardly been able to sleep and eat let alone watch the ...
 
Date: 03/12/2008 4:24amNutcase Gets Revenge on a Hardware Store with his Car
Comment: A million dollars in damage? Those must be some fucking expensive hammers.
 
Date: 03/12/2008 4:23amRunaway Semi Tire Smashes the Windshield of a Van
Comment: I used to have a truck tyre as a toy when i was a wee kiddie.Oh the joys of growing up on ...
 
Date: 02/24/2008 4:24amWoman on Stage Accidentally Sets Herself on Fire
Comment: You forget, it's a RUSSIAN woman.'Kiss me or i'll crush you!'
 
Date: 02/24/2008 4:55amWoman on Stage Accidentally Sets Herself on Fire
Comment: Anyone notice that the guy carefully set his drink down before helping her? Man i love the...
 
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Had buttloads of work to do at uni! Hardly been able to sleep and eat let alone watch the sexy fruits of NT's loins. But i finally caved in and took myself a well deserved break! Had about a weeks worth to catch up on.
A million dollars in damage? Those must be some fucking expensive hammers.
I used to have a truck tyre as a toy when i was a wee kiddie.
Oh the joys of growing up on a British council estate.
You forget, it's a RUSSIAN woman.
'Kiss me or i'll crush you!'
Anyone notice that the guy carefully set his drink down before helping her? Man i love the way Russians do stuff.
Ahahahahaha i've wanted that car alarm ever since i watched it on Max and Paddy xD
Yea mine clocked me in the nuts for almost crying with laughter when she farted and i dropped like a sack of shit. I don't think they understand it's not just painful, but you get that horrible sick feeling that stops you talking and makes your eyes bulge!
Um because he was the guys son and sounded about 12 years old?
He just has 'that voice' which i associate with police chases. Same with David Attenborough and documentaries. God Bless you Sir Attenborough <3
See i love watching Police Camera Action over here in Britain, but GOD does that narrator make me wanna pepperspray someone myself. I'd way prefer the American dude with the white hair over this poncey Oxford boy.
You think they're gonna let a dude on rollerskates reach over 125mph wearing nothing but a crash helmet and leathers?? Especially after what happened to Hammond in the rocket car. And this is top gear, they can slate the car if they like, plenty of times the car has lost against stupid stuff. Yesterday i saw one get beaten by two guys on BMX's, it's not like the car companies are slipping them a fiver and saying 'Make my car win'.
Ahahaha, stitch that Frenchie!
Made up? Of course it's fucking made up! It's not like they drove past a guy on the street wearing rollerskates and challenged him to a race now is it. Im guessing by 'made up' you mean 'pre-planned' and the only answer to that is.. 'duh'.
Posted on: 02/02/2008 4:34amBad Ass Dog Protects Its Owner On Command
I want one. No wait. Two.
My parents love touring Spain on their motorbike and one year they actually decided to do the running of the bulls in Pamplona. Bearing in mind my mum is a 5 foot tall, slightly over weight 55 year old and my dad's the same age and a bit heavier set, im suprised they didn't get mashed into the ground. Oh aye and my mums ginger. Bulls go crazy for the red remember!
I think you also have a lingual monkey mentality.
Muhaha i actually know the answer to that one! Because as primates we used to mate from behind, yknow doggystyle. But then as we started walking upright, it became easier (more fashionable?) or something anyway, to rock the casbah in the missionary position. The transfer from back to front meant that boobs grew (and guys liked them) because they resembled an arse. Ithankyew.
Sigh am i the only one who can turn porn into a biology lesson?
I bet he only has one eye. Damn depth perception, i miss you so.
If only it was an American Football game he mighta got promoted from being a retarded looking mascot.
And this is how garbage men entertain themselves after a long mornings work, and after finding 2 hobos in the back of the truck again. Good work lads ;D
Yea, thats right, ignorant for trying to save peoples fuckin' lives. And yea, whats the problem with banning cigarettes hmm? What good do they actually do to this planet? Give people cancer? Tuberculosis? Banning cars? Lets see, they kill more people every year than anything else, they pollute like a motherbitch, they cause things like THE WAR IN IRAQ over something as stupid as oil, they make tankers spill that oil all over the sea and kill fuck knows how much wildlife. Planes? Planes don't even kill that many people. Travelling by plane is the safest form of transport. Hell you're probably more likely to die walking as a pedestrian than you are on a plane. And yea fast food does kill alot of people, but only because the fat bastards choose to eat it all day long. So before you go mouthing off about being 'ignorant' maybe YOU should learn a few things you opinonated asshole. I wasn't forcing my beliefs on anyone, so theres no need to get all jumped up you douche. Next time how about a 'Well i respect what you think, but personally...' rather than being an absolute cock about it?
Ok.
1. Who the fuck asked you?
2. What the hell does banning cars have to do with animals?
3. Can't you read what i wrote? 'And before anyone bitches about 'You can't just ban one breed of dog, when any breed can, and regularily do, attack people' think about it this way - It's just the same as saying 'You can't ban people keeping Lions if you aren't going to ban housecats too'. Some people don't seem to understand it doesn't matter about the disposition of the breed, aggressive/passive whatever, it's the damn lethality of their bite.'
4. I don't even drive dickwad, and i'm not overweight.
5. Who the fuck asked you?
... Aye. Cheers for that.
Could i ask all you lovley people on NT a favour? This guy has been trying it on with my girlfriend for months. Please sign him up to as much animal porn/neo nazi spam as you possibly can. Much love <3
jnash_10@msn.com
So's that security guards head.
Is it just me or did we used HELP people in a car crash? Yknow, help them out, make them comfy, make sure they can breathe etc. Rather than just stand there looking at their insides draped over them like gooey garlands?
Posted on: 01/20/2008 4:51amPossibly the Worst Skiing Accident Ever
Well i suppose it would be funny.. If everyone on here spoke freakin' German xD
Posted on: 01/20/2008 4:05amPossibly the Worst Skiing Accident Ever
Is it just me.. or does fuck all happen?
Why do my seemingly fine, normal posts keep getting thumbs down?
I wonder if they have special extra-long crutches for Basketball players? Them legs would need about three tons of plaster, you could probably write the Quoran on his cast.
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Why You Definitely Shouldnt Smash This Chicks Pumpkin

Every single thing about this video is absolutely perfect. From the smashed pumpkin, the two "knockouts," and the masturbating cameraman...never has a video been this great in the history of the Internet.

Category: Fights

Posted: 11/06/2007  | Views: 933024  | Comments (322)

Rating: 63 Votes

Old Woman Casually Shits Out of her Pant Leg in a Store

The way she shakes it out with no problem is uncanny. She's like a professional public shitter.

Category: Bizarre

Posted: 01/24/2008  | Views: 62249  | Comments (128)

Rating: 28 Votes

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